As I said on my Twitter post, I need to get things going again. I’ve said it many time before, but this time the blogging will start again. Life must get balanced, time is manageable and writing will be therapy. It has been far too long since I’ve been here.

Just when I thought the second child issue was put to rest, I went and had a laparoscopy for my endometriosis two weeks ago and now my OB/GYN has declared me free flowing. So we are going to “try” again for a couple months. If nothing happens, hubby is willing to get himself and his boys checked out. In reality, nothing has happened in 2 years of trying, whether trying meant not paying attention and hoping it would just happen, taking fertility drugs, taking my temperature and charting or buying overprices ovulation test kits. Nothing has happened. I had one cycle when I was 3 days late, but the stick didn’t have matching lines. It may just be age. It might not be meant to be. We have one extremely intelligent and absolutely beautiful daughter and maybe that’s all we are meant to have. And she has a half-sister, so it’s not like she doesn’t have a sibling. But that sibling, as much as they love each other, is on the edge of the teenage years and who know how long she’ll still want to come visit her sister that is 8 years her junior.

The other thought that hits me like a brick wall is the “what if something happens” thought. Then, my only child would be alone. My siblings were a source of so much strength and power when dad died 5 years ago and I wonder how I would have been able to get through it without them.

Time will tell if there is another in store for us. If not, the one we have is plenty.